There are two main, current, social, mainstream, and mental health predominant theories and approaches, on moderating or so-called curing masochism. The first is more liberal and socialist, and much more accurate. The second theory and approach, is very right-wing, and false and accurate, although some very left-wing people believe in this theory and approach too.
The first theory and approach, to moderating masochism of men towards women, says that it is related to the fact that the masochist person, is being dominated and/or bullied, and made to be submissive, by people who control or have more power than them, in their home, family, or work life, whether those who dominate and/or bully them in this way, are male or female (because any kind of domination in these ways, makes masochism in men towards women more intense), and in terms of some moderation of masochism, there is a lot of truth in this first theory and approach.
Whilst masochism by men towards women, can't be cured, it can in some ways - and in various ways - be moderated, and this first theory, is also to with the masochist person having better assertiveness skills, and more equal relationships with others, and which is again, both accurate, true, and correct.
On the other hand, we must also ask ourselves, that if masochism by men towards women is not a problem - if women both enjoy and need this - and if masochist men also like and enjoy this (without any unwanted harm to themselves or others), then why should it be moderated? Do homosexual men and women, and non-masochist/BDSM people, have to moderate their natural sexuality in this and these ways? Obviously they don't. However, if the masochist person, is being unwantedly dominated, bullied, and made to be submissive socially, then this as a separate issue is a problem, but being sexually submissive, and socially submissive -whilst connected and related - are also two completely separate things and issues.
The second theory and approach to the moderating, and so-called curing of masochism, which is very right-wing, is that masochism of masochist men towards women, is caused by men allowing themselves to be dominated by women socially - and not being more manipulative, controlling, and masterful with women - and what's more that masochism of men towards women, is caused by domineering mothers. This second theory, is completely untrue and false, and what's more, it is actually blaming women for masochism in men towards women (which is overall biological, like homosexuality), and saying that the solution is for masochist men, is to have very domineering and bullying male father figures, or to be dominated and made to be submissive to other men, but again, any kind of domination and bullying - by women or men - actually intensifies masochism.
The other part of this second, and very right-wing theory and approach, is the belief and view, that any kind of altruism, is in itself masochism, and a main cause of masochism. This theory, also sees any kind of altruism, as repellent, counter-productive, and all to do with a total lack of self-care, but it is simply not true, that altruism is in itself masochism, nor a main cause of masochism, because masochism in men towards women, is like homosexuality, overall biological, although it can in some ways be moderated.
Whilst self-care and self-sufficiency, is up to a point obviously a good thing, too much of these things - or too much selfish individualism - also co-exists with and creates (on another level), much more conformity, and whilst conformity is not a major cause of masochism, too much conformity - like too much individualism - can also intensify masochism.
